Death is a reality that each and every one of us faces everyday. It is a universal truth that is unavoidable yet it remains in the shadow of conversation, recognized but unspoken. And when it does move from the shadows it is rarely discussed openly and with alacrity. Instead it carries the stigma of morbidity, the connotation that to be interested in death makes you abnormal or unhealthy.
But if that's the way of the world, I say, bring it on! My friends and family are by this time used to the "interesting" subjects and questions I bring up so when I posted on Facebook asking them what grave goods they would include in my burial they all took it in stride. Some even wanted a reciprocal response and have since posed their own queries to their friends and family.
The variety of responses I received was actually quite remarkable. The most popular response was definitely objects that I am known to love or that can easily be associated with my person:
• Peanut M&M's
• My Softball Glove
• Amber Jewellry
• My favourite sweater
The second most popular response were items that were a reflection of the mourner's memory of me rather than items I could easily identify with myself:
• Maple Syrup
• Books
• A Silver Fern leaf
• Photos
The third response was probably the most interesting for me as it consisted of items for my use in the afterlife. I personally have no belief in such a thing and so had not considered such items:
• Flint & Pyrite
• Compass
A fourth category, which also held my interest were items that were representative of private jokes or memories between myself and the mourner. I found this particularly fascinating as they hold no meaning to other outsiders and it did appeal to me to imagine future archaeologists digging up my grave and the inferences they would make from this particular category of goods.
Overall, I found this an interesting exercise in how objects are imbued with meaning and value and how subjective it all really is. I like to think that my identity is more a reflection of my thoughts and ideas, the principals by which I live my life then it is the objects which I use to live it with.
That being said, the only item I would want it my grave has stipulations. If we happen to die at the same time, I would want my dog Simon to rest happily by my side.
